I am a fun, fearless female. Well, almost.

The Situation

So, this Sunday I had to attend a function that would end a little late in the night. Mother announced that I would not drive back alone in the night even before I asked her for the car. Let me tell you that my mother is an avid reader of page 4 and 5 of both Hindustan Times and Times of India. She also watches all major news channels to keep herself updated about the latest crimes in the city. If someone has been abused, killed, robbed, or raped … she has read about it.

The Problem

After much discussion about perils of traveling alone at night it was decided that a trustworthy driver shall be hunted down and asked to drive me to the function. Finding a trustworthy driver was as simple as finding a spot on a white shirt washed in Surf Excel. Nevertheless, one was found and instructed to pick me up at seven in the evening.

The Twist

At quarter to seven, mother panicked. Again. “Be careful,” she advocated, “you never know although this guy is trusted by Mr. So-and-so…but still.” And then when I was about to lose my calm she suggested that I should carry my can of pepper spray.

The Event

After a quick search, I found the can stacked in my deodorant and perfume cabinet. Next, I dusted it and tried to check if it was still functional. I tweaked the cap to ensure it was tightened right and then I pressed the nozzle just a little bit, just to be sure. Of course, I had aimed it in the other direction. What do you think I am? Dumb?

Umm…when I say the other direction, I mean towards the desert cooler.

The Repercussion

I was quick though. Switched the cooler off and rubbed ice over my exposed arm. But I still found myself coughing and sneezing uncontrollably. Mother came into the room a few minutes later and started sneezing immediately. With our eyes watering unstoppably, we rejoiced the effectiveness of the spray and I declared that now she had no reason or need to worry about my safety.

I got into the car minutes later, my arm burning, eyes watering, and nose itching like crazy. Four-five hours later, my arm and fingers still burning like mad, I returned home to a completely relaxed mother.


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