It's Show Time, Baby.

Delhi's heat is getting to me. I have been spoilt in a week by Hyderabad’s uber pleasant weather. Now, my skin is a shade of bronze minus the sparkles, eyes red at the corners, and throat perpetually parched. To my left hand, there is a 750 ML bottle of water affixed. And I just had an orange candy. But I am not here to talk about the heat. I am here to tell you about experience of watching my first ever Telugu film in a theater.

Wanted to watch Cheeni Kum and went hopping across the movie-crazy city of Hyderabad to find the tickets. Negative. Tried Ocean's Thirteen. Negative. But I had to, just had to, watch a movie on the big screen. So I impelled the friends to buy tickets for a Telugu masala movie, Aata. Getting the tickets of a movie in a language that none of us understand made complete sense to me at that moment. My logic:

1. Must try everything once!
2. How wrong can movie buffs go with a masala movie?
3. We all know the leading man of the film. Familiarity helps.
4. Tickets ARE available.

In my defense, I had read/heard a bit about the movie and knew it was a standard run-of-the-mill film. Also, all three who were going to watch the film have watched enough bad Hindi movies in their time and are conditioned for such. Well, so Sunday morning 10:30 (actually, 10:45, coz we are always late!) I was seated inside the dark movie hall, feet up and all, with all my senses geared to catch something. And here is what I gathered; you may correct me if you know better. 🙂

Aata, which means 'show,' is a story of a boy who is a film buff and a girl who is running away from goons. The girl, called Sathya, is played by a cute chick called Ileana D'Cruz. The boy, called Sri Krishna, is played by the familiar Siddharth Narayan (Remember the solemn Karan Singhania in Rang De Basanti?). So, there is a bad boy who wears his jeans low enough to reveal his Tommy Hilfiger undies and goes around the city raping and killing women. His dad, of course, is the CM and his mum wears heavy silk sarees and tonns of gold and beats up her son's bodyguards. So the baddy rapes a girl who is known to our Sathya. In anger, Sathya picks up a stone and hits Baddy, who decides to take revenge on being hit publically by a woman. He soon spots the pretty Sathya dancing at her friend's wedding. He gives the look to his mum, who quickly makes arrangements of getting Baddy engaged to the pretty Sathya then and there. Post the forced ceremony, Sathya runs away from her home and Baddy. What next? She bumps into our show boy, Sri Krishna at nothing less than a fair. He takes her along on a boat, to an island and back. Then they run and the goons follow, they save puppies, jump and faint in wells, and fight over a non-existent boyfriend. Their running sequence is aptly punctuated with songs in cute dresses and love happens. Ultimately they are caught and presented to Baddy and his mum. But now, hold your breath, there is a twist in the tale. Sri Krishna is actually in Baddy's team and happily hands over the innocent Sathya to him. Baddy is pleased with Sri and makes him his brother and friend, the kind who always follows Baddy everywhere. Our Sathya is heart broken and promptly shifts to wearing salwar-kameez. Sri now gives lessons to Baddy on how to win Sathya's heart. In the process, they all go horse riding, where horses go dotty and throw people over. Sri saves Sathya's life, complete '50s style. He then reveals his masterplan to her by telling her that he loves her but has to do this drama to solve the problem and rid her of Baddy. Sathya is happy and together the two make out in front of Baddy who has now turned into a clown. Next, Sathya demands jewelry from Rajasthan in order to get married. Promptly, Baddy leaves for Rajasthan along with his friends. There, they shop and then decide to dance in bizarre non-Rajasthani dresses. Sri slips a gift in Baddy's hands and tells him to impress the lady with it. But the lady does not want a golden deer (the one handed over by Sri), she wants a real one! Baddy leaves immediately to hunt for one in the land of black bucks-made-popular-by-Salman Khan and gets arrested for the same. Awesome! Soon, some pundits are called to select a date for marriage. But these guys are from Sri's village and help him by telling Baddy's folks that the fat-silk-clad-gold-laden mum will die if the girl marries Baddy. However, this can be averted by making the girl marry someone else, just like Aishwarya did. And who else but Sri comes to Baddy's rescue? In happiness and glee, our couple sings a song that goes “balle balle,” I kid you not! However, all plans go down the drain when Baddy finds out the real story (all he has to do is overhear a phone conversation!) and then they fight. Blood is shed, fight is had, buildings are jumped, and ultimately Baddy is caught by the special task force of the police, the one that does not care about the CM. Baddy is also threatened by the students from all over Hyderabad, who appear out of the blue with cellphones in their hands, ready to send SMS-es to somebody of importance to show their support for the girl who got raped and killed. Remember her? So, Baddy is behind the bars and the couple is together. All is well and that is the end.

I am watching more Telugu movies from now on. What fun!

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