Worst Five Films of the ‘90s

The movie love happened in very late ’80s, in fact, the last quarter of the last year of the ‘80s. I caught on to the movie scene in the early ‘90s and thus, the particular decade has always been and will remain special to me. I have often made many lists about my top five movies by a certain actor or director or in a specific genre, but now it is time for the worst five of the decade. Now, if you are tuned into Bollywood of the ‘90s, you know there is extremely tough competition for the five positions. Nevertheless, the winners are:

Number Five: Sapne Sajan Ke

This Karishma Kapoor and Rahul Roy starrer came in the year 1992, when the love stories sold like hotcakes, especially if you added the icing of Nadeem-Shravan’s music to it. Lawrence D’souza also added some chocolate chip cookies to this already tempting cake in the form of guest appearances by Dimple Kapadia and Jakie Sheroff. The two stars played themselves, while Karishma plays daughter of a tailor or some such and Rahul is the son of Jakie’s chauffer. Rahul portrays himself as a rich guy to gain Karishma and her mother’s approval, only the mother discovers the truth in the second half of the film. Such refreshingly new story was enacted by the stone-faced Roy and pre-Manish Malhotra Kapoor in her garish avatar. A clip to refresh your memory:

Number Four: Guddu

Shahrukh Khan had already attained his star status by 1995, when this film released. Along with used-to-be-gorgeous Manisha Koirala, Khan made this unbelievably thick film and it was released amidst a lot of hype. Shahrukh plays a pampered rich boy, Guddu (as if this was not enough) Bahadur. He loves Manisha and the two innocent kids run around in the hay promising to ask their daddy about love-induced cold sweat. And then they meet with an accident in which Manisha loses her eyesight and Shahrukh, along with the girl’s parents, blames himself for it. Manisha does not agree but never bothers to tell this to Shahrukh as she does not want to “burden” him. This pure and unselfish love is reciprocated by Shahrukh who finds out that he has brain tumor and is destined to die soon. Reasonably enough, he decides to donate his eyes to Manisha, but no his parents would not let him! Excessive hamming, twisted story, and more, Guddu had it all. For your viewing pleasure:

Number Three: Yarana

One of the copies (won’t call it a remake coz there was no acknowledgement!) of Sleeping with the Enemy, the film starred the always-ravishing Madhuri Dixit in a very ugly wig and round-like-a-football Rishi Kapoor, along with the forever-evil Raj Babbar.  Madhuri’s evil uncle sells her off to Babbar, who falls in love (not lust, this is a Hindi film, ok.) with her at the first sight. She runs off on the wedding day, and turns into a mannequin to hide from Babbar’s people. A drunk rich boy, our football-lookalike hero, falls in love with the mannequin and picks it up to take it home. This time around, Madhuri does not mind. She then poses as Rishi Kapoor’s girlfriend to help him appease his ailing granddad whose dying wish is – TAKE A WILD GUSS – to see his grandson married! Much crappiness follows. Amidst all this crappiness was a delightful song that is still fun to watch:

Number Two: Raja Hindustani

First off, let me tell you that this film was a very strong contender for number one position. Story was simple, poor boy meets rich girl, falls in love, kisses her by mistake, post the kiss the girl loves him too and calls him Raja Jee, and marries him against the family’s wish. Step mom is very unhappy and makes trouble, girl fights with the boy and then things happen that are very blurry in my head. Ultimately, the boy grows beard, steals his own son (who was born during those blurry moments) and runs away. The girl begs the boy to return the baby and then somehow everything is alright, all misunderstanding clear up and the whole bloody nation is giddy with joy. I still cannot believe this shitty film was block buster. What is wrong with you people?! And no, I will not link to the Pardesi song here, if you want to hear it you can go to Lahore or Lukla or Kasauli …anywhere not my blog. Nevertheless, here is an equally disturbing song:

Number One: Isi Ka Naam Zindagi

Tell me, did you know about this film? If  not, consider yourself very lucky or maybe not. This film is so bad that it is hilarious. It leaves the usual bad Hindi films way behind. The movie stars none other than the perfectionist of Bollywood, Aamir Khan along with Farah and Shakti Kapoor. The story is so contrived that I do not remember it, but it went something like this: Set in the times of British Raj is a small village with a generous landlord, who dies leaving everything behind to his lecherous son (Shakti Kapoor) who likes to rape virgins. But this son also wants a particular piece of land of a poor farmer, who does not want to sell it. The landlord’s son dies somehow. Then the dead son’s lookalike brother comes and asks for the land. All this while the dead landlord roams around as a ghost, trying to make some point that I cannot remember for the life of me. Then time passes and finally the lookalike son comes to meet the farmer again (he got busy for like good thirty years in between), but the farmer is now a hundred years old and has a grandson (Aamir Khan) who wants to use the land to open a daaru ki bhatti. The landlord decides to take advantage of this situation and then there is Farah who sings gulai gulai gu. What? You do not believe me? Wait, watch this and tell me you love me for giving you such gems:

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One Response to “Worst Five Films of the ‘90s”

  1. Issi Ka Naam Zindagi is awesome. 😀

    Can never forget Shakti Kapoor atop a tree and a wobbly Pran. 😀 😀

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